We Italians have somehow deluded ourselves into thinking Magnum, pronounced “Manyoom”, is Italian. We really hate to break it to you, but it’s so not. Some place the Magnum’s origins in Denmark, others in Belgium. Literally no one–except every Italian who’s never bothered to search–places it in Italy. But the ice cream bars, along with their gelati confezionati brethren, are undoubtedly an integral component of any estate Italiana. Despite the sheer abundance of fantastic artisanal gelateria, in the summertime, we forgo fresh cream and natural ingredients for the skimmed milk powder and stabilizers of prepackaged ice creams (which, strangely, can be even more expensive than the handmade stuff). But there’s just something so estate Italiana about snagging one from the freezer after a sweaty game of racchettoni at the stabilimento, or getting one tossed to you over a sailboat’s balustrades from the little dinghy that cruises around handing them out. gelati confezionati will continue to mark our Italian summers, no matter if we’re six or 60. 

Although there are great options from the likes of Sammontana and Nestlé, the undisputed queen of the gelati confezionati offerings is Algida, which, although it does have Italian origins, is now owned by Unilever, the same British-Dutch mega-corporation that makes our beloved Manyooms. The company, which takes its name from the Latin algidus, meaning “cold” or “freezing”, started in 1946 as an artisanal gelateria in Rome at the hands of duo Italo Barbiani and Alfred Wiesner. The latter was an Austrian-Jewish engineer, who, after escaping a concentration camp during WWII, joined the Italian Resistance, becoming head of information of Marche’s volunteer division. For his efforts, the Allies, at the end of the war, gifted Wiesner the “patriot certificate”… and two ice cream machines. Thanks to Weisner’s background in engineering, the company developed an innovative industrial system for producing pre-packaged ice creams and skyrocketed to the top of the Italian sector–a title that it still holds today. Although we don’t condone megacorps and their consolidation of power in the food industry–there are some serious ethical and sustainability questions to think about here–gelati confezionati will continue to mark our Italian summers, no matter if we’re six or 60. 

So, whether you’re an OG like the Cremino, Algida’s first-ever product, or a snazzy newcomer like the Pirulo, keep scrolling to see which gelato confezionato fits your vibe!

ARIES 

Walks like it’s crunchy, talks like it’s crunchy, tastes like it’s crunchy: a CROCCANTE isn’t afraid to tell it as it is, and neither is an Aries. Aries aggressively feel the need to prove themselves and aren’t afraid to shout from the rooftops to do so. Competitive, ambitious, and high-energy, Aries are quick to anger, but are equally quick to soften. Like an Aries, the Croccante, as soon as you get past the initial bite’s hard shell, is soft and creamy. Aries are highly opinionated and will bare their teeth to defend their ideals, but they also wear their hearts on their sleeves; the gooey, cherry-flavored filling of a Croccante is just like the heart of an Aries, intense and passionate, but also tender and giving. Of course, the Croccante is sweet–it’s a prepackaged ice cream, after all–but the cherry core gives it a sour side too. Aries, likewise, aren’t sugar-coated–and won’t sweeten down their words or feelings for anyone. Those who love an Aries will equally love a Croccante: blunt, direct, daring, and sweet (on the inside).

TAURUS 

Patient and steady Tauruses are a perfect match for the most patient and steady gelato confezionato: the CREMINO CLASSICO. When the world feels like it’s falling apart, and ice cream companies are coming out with pistachio-caramel-extreme-plus-in-the-shape-of-a-rose confections, Tauruses and Cremino Classicos are rocks of dependability. These earth signs tend to be satisfied with the way things are, though this doesn’t mean that they’re not ambitious. Instead, they’d rather work hard, but steadily, without overexerting themselves, to reach their goals. The Cremino has a similar work ethic: the simple vanilla ice cream covered in chocolate on a stick might just be one of the most popular packaged ice creams across the boot, but it hasn’t achieved this with any glitz or glam. These earth signs aren’t easily moved by criticism–as one of the most stubborn signs, it’s near impossible to change their mind–and the same is true of the Cremino. We wouldn’t be surprised if it keeps on keeping on with the same recipe for another century plus. And this is the thing about both Tauruses and Creminos: they are set in their ways, dependable, and absolutely timeless.

GEMINI 

CUCCIOLONE literally translates to “large puppy”. Fitting, for these childlike air signs are known for curious natures and senses of humor, and the Cucciolone–vanilla, chocolate, and zabaione ice cream sandwiched between two comic-stamped cookies–might just be the funniest ice cream bar out there. Mirroring these two-faced signs, the Cucciolone’s flavors have a dual nature: the zabaione is complex and deep like one twin, while the vanilla is light and easy like the other. The famous comics have marked this ice cream bar since the 80s, when the brand collaborated with Disney, and have since featured famous cartoonists like Silver, who invented Eldo Leo the lion, Giorgio Cavazzano, and Federico Panella. But the Cucciolone comics from 2014 to 2021 are the most Gemini of them all. The BORING series put to cookies the story of an agency that worked to bore people; it was the job of the Cucciolone to fight their evil efforts. Geminis, too, are warriors against boredom, and, as they are quite easily subject to the feeling, this makes them active, active, active. It’s not uncommon to see them jumping from one party to the next, where they can be comfortable taking on either an introverted or extroverted role. Like all air signs, they can easily adapt to the energy of a room, becoming either a social butterfly or wallflower. That being said, they literally could talk to a wall–and clearly so can a Cucciolone.

CANCER

FIOR DI FRAGOLA–a pop of crema covered in strawberry-flavored ice–is exactly the same. Cancers have just one boundary, and it’s a very firm one, but once you’re past it, it’s complete openness, coziness, and comfort. What you’ll find is that this bright gelato confezionato brings a little color to any person or place, as does a Cancer, whose creativity knows no limits. These sensitive, deep-feeling signs respond to the slightest of stimuli, and this may be the reason behind their reputation as the most nostalgic of the zodiac. And for us Italians, Fior di Fragola might be the prepackaged ice cream that brings us back most to the Italian summers of our childhood. We eat Cornettos, Creminos, and the like year-round, but this strawberry pop practically screams summer. In our memories, Fior di Fragola fits into gentle scenes, as gentle as a Cancer, of long afternoons at the beach, running barefoot over the hot sand, and checking our tan lines obsessively in the mirror. Of course, what we often found instead was a bright red burn straddling the pale spot where our bathing suit straps were, making our shoulders look uncannily like a Fior di Fragola itself. Cancers do like to know what’s expected of them, as a Fior di Fragola gives you a hint of what’s to come with that one slice of crema, which is, as every Italian knows, the place to start.

LEO 

You can probably tell from the name alone that a MAXIBON is a little bit vain, just like a Leo. The Maxibon has a large presence–with a hefty gram count to boot–easily standing out among the offerings of gelati confezionati. Big personalities are a trademark of these fire signs too, and it’s a trait that allows them to be fantastic performers, both literally on a stage and metaphorically in social contexts. The glorified ice cream sandwich–stracciatella ice cream, covered in chocolate and hazelnuts on one half and sandwiched between biscuits on the other–is clearly well-versed in the art of creating a protective shield. Leos too like to hide their vulnerabilities from others, which contributes to their aura of unbreakability. In a cult TV advertisement for Maxibon from the 90s, actor Stefano Accorsi, in macaronic English, claims “du gust is megl che uan“, a rough translation of which is “two flavors are better than one”. Leos would wholeheartedly agree. These lions love a bit of excess and are skilled in the art of finding a million things to do–two characteristics that make Leo one of the most fun signs to be around.

VIRGO 

Virgos have a quick fix for everything. And you know what’s a quick fix when you’re at the beach and you want gelato but you’re too far from a gelateria? A CORNETTO. In the mind of a Virgo, everything has its place: organized spaces with an attention to detail are a trademark of this earth sign, and the Cornetto, likewise, has its predetermined layers. A swirl of vanilla ice cream and chocolate–evenly distributed–topped with a sprinkle of nuts feeds into a cone with a little chocolate at the bottom, hidden away like the heart of a Virgo. It’s hard to know what self-contained Virgos are thinking or feeling, so they can often come across as judgemental, though they really do always have good intentions. Cornetto means “little horn”, which is how the Virgo tongue can sometimes feel. The packaged ice cream was invented in Naples in 1959 by the manufacturer Spica, which overcame the problem of frozen cones turning soggy by protecting the inside of the waffle cone with a layer of oil, sugar, and chocolate–a bout of ingeniousness worthy of a Virgo. It’s much like a Virgo to create a protective layer for their friends and family, putting themselves between others and the harshness of the world–even at the expense of their own comforts. Virgos’ greatest happiness comes from feeling like they’re useful, and though they want to be acknowledged and appreciated, they don’t need elaborate thanks to feel valued. The same feels true of the Cornetto, a workhorse of the prepackaged ice creams, there for you always.

LIBRA

For the sign that hates being alone, the only possible option is an ice cream that always comes in a group: I BON BON from Sammontana, individual bites of vanilla ice cream covered in chocolate shells with crushed hazelnuts. These air signs are the diplomats of the zodiac, and they need to see every side of an argument, question, or debate before taking their stance. With six sides to each piece and 16 pieces per container, I Bon Bon might just have as many sides, and personalities, as a Libra. Libras are leaders in the art of adapting, and, as they deeply value empathy, they tend to reflect the people that they’re around. This often creates an entire universe of personalities within Libras, whose penchant for people-pleasing causes them to pick and choose which face to put forward–but Libras should be careful about making themselves bite-sized for other people! Gentle Libras don’t hate anyone (to their face), and you can’t tell us these cutesy bon bons don’t have the same vibe. Like I Bon Bon, Libras’ exteriors–elegant, composed–are in contrast with their interiors–chaotic, indecisive (perhaps the most Libra trait of all).

SCORPIO 

Scorpios are not the most easily likable. Neither is LIUK, a lemony ice pop with a stick of licorice candy. But the both of them are willing to invite you into their inner complexities with the right amount of work. It takes time for a Scorpio to feel close to someone–just like this lemon-forward gelato confezionato, which requires seeing it through till the end for the true licorice taste. Intense, loyal, and assertive are three adjectives that could just as easily describe the powerful personalities of Scorpio and Liuk’s licorice. Enigmatic and independent, Liuks and Scorpios may rub some people the wrong way, but no one can deny that their fierce charisma makes them absolutely unignorable. These water signs live for the thrill and are not afraid to take risks–a feeling as invigorating as Liuk’s combo of bitter, sweet, and sour. These scorpions will fight to the end for what they believe in and know how to make an impact, so it’s no surprise that Liuk has made its way past Italian borders to become one of the most popular prepackaged pops in the Netherlands too. Scorpios, however, tend to achieve their goals through words. The Scorpio tongue is capable of being moving, stirring, and inspiring, but is also as sharp and acidic as Liuk’s Sicilian lemons. On a board of milky, toned-down ice cream options, Liuk easily stands out–just like a Scorpio. Trust us, there’s no way to temper the taste of Liuk, nor that of a Scorpio.

SAGITTARIUS 

Friendly and bright Sagittarians find their match in SOLERO EXOTIC, that pop whose combination of peach, pineapple, mango, and passion fruit (somehow) makes it neon orange. Solero Exotic is a packaged ice cream that’s clearly trying to bill itself as adventurous–as does a Sagittarius. These fire signs are represented by the archer for good reason: they’re fearless explorers of the universe, both of the physical world and of their own selves. And, on all their journeys, they’re always unabashedly colorful. Sagittarians’ Solero-sunny dispositions make them some of the easiest people to talk to at a party, but they can also scare people off when they wield their truth like a weapon. But though Sagittarians have a penchant for putting up a strong front, they’re secretly huge softies inside, much like the vanilla inside a Solero: punchy fruitiness makes up just some swirls and strands of their personalities. The optimism of a Solero is as infectious as that of a Sagittarius, and they both know how to stick their mind to a goal and stop at nothing to complete it.

CAPRICORN 

Capricorns seem to be fully grown by age five, and what’s a children’s ice cream with an old soul? COPPA DEL NONNO, that coffee ice cream in a plastic cup shaped like a coffee mug whose name literally translates to “grandfather’s cup”. As far as gelati confezionati go, Coppa del Nonno is a pretty sensible one–and Capricorn is the most sensible sign of the zodiac. Capricorns are the “responsible” friends, the ones who are pragmatic, always, and disciplined, most of the time–but when they’re not, they’re really not. The classic Coppa del Nonno recipe has altered to become sweeter over the years, and the same is true of Capricorns; it just takes a bit of time for them to warm up to people, but, when they do, you really get to see their looser, more sensitive side. Capricorns aren’t attention-seeking, but they definitely want to be respected. Likewise, Coppa del Nonno isn’t ostentatious–it’s not trying to dominate the freezer–but it can hold its own against any fruity, flashy pop. The ice cream cup’s slogan is “nessuno come te” (“no one like you”), and, to a Capricorn, there really is no one like themselves to rely on. These earth signs are fully self-sufficient, partially because they know they can achieve their goals on their own, partially because they’re scared of depending on others.

AQUARIUS 

Aquarians and PIRULO TROPICAL: they’re ~different, they’re ~exotic, and though it may seem unintentional, they’re 100% trying to be alternative. Aquarians might sometimes go around lamenting the question–“Why can’t I be normal?”–but, truth is, they think normalcy is lame. Clearly, the creators of Pirulo Tropical thought the same: its zigzagging, twisty shape is meant to defy the classic forms of packaged ice creams, just as Aquarians work to break from definitions in their constant pursuit of personal freedom. Aquarians want to be unknowable, and the same is true of any ice cream that labels itself tropical: what does that even mean? (In the case of Pirulo, it seems to be passion fruit, mango, peach, and pineapple.) One of the most intellectual zodiac signs, Aquarians run Pirulo-esque spirals around their interlocutors and, no matter how much they may want to be individualistic, always have the greater good in mind.

PISCES 

These water signs are somehow eight and 80 years old at the same time, so what better than the CALIPPO, a pop that is only your favorite if you’re under eight or above 80? Prone to fantasy, Pisces are colorful and fun, but they can also be a bit addicted to melancholy, a trait that leads them to withdraw. Anyone who’s wrangled with keeping a Calippo from sliding back into its packaging knows the feeling. It takes a certain someone to know how to lift them up–and keep them lifted. The Pisces charm, too, is fetching to some and frustrating to others. Pisces want to feel intensely, and wallowing in a pit of despair is much preferable to apathy. It’s the equivalent of reaching the end of Calippo only to realize you ate too slowly and half the pop is resting in a sticky slush at the bottom of the wrapper. All in all, Pisces are great fun to be around, and their lack of boundaries makes them easy to get along with–much like the Calippo, always ready to animatedly spring upwards and onwards.