ARIES

Competitive Aries perfectly match the chaos of the FOOTBALL STADIUM. Here in Italy, football is one of the five most successful ways to work us up, and we bring an intensity to games that is unparalleled. Aries seem to always have this level of energy and passion and would fit right in cheering on their team and trash-talking their opponents with fiery enthusiasm. Individuals that thrive on challenge and excitement, Aries often set their sights on victory and push themselves and their teammates to reach their full potential. These fire signs also wear their hearts on their sleeves like team colors and are not afraid to fight for what they love. Fiercely loyal, Aries will travel anywhere for their people: the same is true of diehard football fans who will head to the other side of the country for a match. 

However, Aries can also be impulsive and prone to rash decisions. Sports fans clearly don’t think everything through at the stadium either, and many hospitalizations and criminal cases have been born at the hands of football “ultras”–the most passionate and rowdy fans.

TAURUS

Stubborn Tauruses find their bull-headed equal in the ANAGRAFE, the official registry of residents in Italy. Maintained by the government, the Anagrafe serves as a record of individuals’ personal information, including their name, date, place of birth, citizenship, and other identifying information. Tauruses are better secret keepers than anyone else: like the Anagrafe, these zodiac signs are the ones you should trust to keep your private information safe. (Another facet of their stubbornness: they’re impossible to break!) Now the problem with the Anagrafe is that it takes visits upon visits, hours upon hours to actually get anything done. Tauruses likewise have a reputation for being lazy, but that’s not quite right. They just prioritize, and really appreciate, relaxation and self-care. These earth signs understand the Anagrafe’s need to take a two-hour lunch break! One of the most patient zodiac signs, Tauruses don’t mind waiting: they will do things as they should be done, no matter how long it might take, and value when others do the same.

GEMINI

Ah, the Italian PIAZZA, a square-shaped arena of sociable chaos. Geminis are known as signs of duality, represented by the twins: this can manifest in different ways, including a love for chaos and an affinity for change and variety. These desires are perfectly satisfied by the piazza, which offers a miscellany of experiences at every hour of the day. Just like the Gemini twins–calm and collected on one side and playful on the other–the piazza shows more than one face. It’s a place to shop at a bustling market, but also a place to sit on a bench in the shade and read. It’s a place to knock elbows at aperitivo, but also a place to leisurely sip coffee. And, like the ever-changing piazza, Geminis may have trouble sticking to a routine or committing to a particular path.

Charismatic Geminis have a quick wit and are entertaining and engaging companions who love to meet new people; the social nature of the piazza, a place to meet new friends from all walks of life, is perfect for these energetic and affable air signs.

CANCER

Nurturing and supportive Cancers find their chaotic match in the Italian HOSPITAL. These water signs are empathetic and sensitive to the needs of others and are often seen as natural caregivers. Hospitals, which are public in Italy, are open to everyone, and yet the organization’s biggest drawback is its speed. It can take hours to be seen by a doctor after arriving at urgent care, and non-urgent surgeries might even take years to get to. Cancers too are known for being steady but slow workers! These sensitive crabs are also the biggest hypochondriacs on this planet, worrying excessively about their health. But the reason isn’t fear: it’s a vivid imagination that’s also the source of their vast creativity. 

Cancers are strongly connected to home and family and, like the hospital, care deeply about the wellbeing of their loved ones. These water signs are the ones constantly checking in and making sure follow-ups are met–medically and otherwise. However, they themselves can be a bit difficult to crack: cancers hide behind their crab shells in the same way that Italians shield themselves from the dreaded colpo d’aria underneath layers upon layers of scarfs, hats and sweaters–or else, you guessed it, they might end up in the hospital.

LEO

These fire signs are known for their extreme confidence and outgoing nature. What better place than the Italian MERCATO? Like a bustling market in Italy (have you ever seen the ones in Sicily?!), Leos exude a magnetic energy and charisma that draws others to them. It’s kinda hard not to love them. These lions are loud, colorful, colorfully loud and loudly colorful, and the same is true of any market you might find here: teetering piles of ruby-red tomatoes and sunny lemons, overlapping shouts of “FRUTTA FRESCA!”, the thump of butcher knives cutting through juicy, fragrant melons. Essential to the markets of Italy is a bit of showmanship and performance. There’s the vendor offering thin slices of peach to try, the one who yells his offerings with a resonant baritone, and the other who shows off some savvy with a machete. With a natural flair for drama, Leos too like to be flashy, standing out in a crowd and capturing the attention of whomever they’d like. 

Leos also share a generosity of spirit with the vendors of an Italian market. Naturally generous and giving, Leos would thrive in the warmth and hospitality of the mercato, where customers are welcomed with open arms and a taste of the latest from the farm.

VIRGO

Practical and diligent Virgos find their personality mirrored by the Italian POSTE. In Italy, the Poste is more than just a place to send and receive mail: it’s where you go for money orders, insurance claims, traffic fines, and quite literally every administrative form you might need. Likewise, Virgos, no matter what they try their hand at, always deliver. You could call both Virgos and the Poste jacks of all trades. But every little thing at the Poste takes so much time: it’s a place where only the elderly really have time to wait (perhaps they’ve been there since the 16th century, when the Duke of Tuscany established the first postal service in Italy?). Virgos also don’t mind how much time needs to be spent: these maidens are happy as long as stuff is getting done–zero procrastination allowed. But Virgos need to remember that their perfectionism is, in the end, detrimental to their goals. The same is true of the Poste, where everything needs to be exactly right or you can be taking new queue numbers until the end of time. 

Virgos, don’t get bogged down in the details: take a moment to look up and see the bigger picture. You’ll find that the Poste, although it may be meant for the most menial of tasks, is often housed in the most beautiful of spaces. Take, for example, the Poste in Florence’s Piazza della Repubblica or Rome’s Piazza San Silvestro.

LIBRA

This diplomatic air sign is matched by the ITALIAN PARLIAMENT, a bicameral chaos (especially these days) of 945 politicians with a whole mishmash of agendas. Known for their sense of balance, harmony and justice, Libras seek to find compromise in any situation; the scales of the zodiac have a natural ability to see different perspectives and are skilled at finding common ground between opposing viewpoints. (In theory) this is the role of the Parliament too. But Libras are terminally indecisive, a trait that often leads to stagnation–which plagues the parliament too. Always looking for the best outcome for everyone, Libras can drive themselves crazy weighing the pros and cons. People-pleasing Libras are easily influenced by others’ opinions–just as the Parliament should take into account the needs and desires of the Italian people. 

Libras have an eye for beauty and aesthetics and often have a refined sense of style. Elegant Libras would fit right into the Parliament, where stylish and sophisticated Italian suits are the norm. (Have you ever sat for lunch at Al Moro on a weekday?) Where these politicians work is no shabby office either: the Parliament building, Palazzo Montecitorio, features neoclassical style and a grand facade. Grandness and beauty, fit for a Libra! 

SCORPIO

Goal-oriented Scorpios are a perfect match for the Italian TRAIN. These water signs play the long game: every turn, brake and accelerate is calculated with their final destination in mind. Scorpios are focused and determined, just like our express trains, the history of which dates back to the mid-19th century, when the country’s first railway line was built between Naples and Portici in 1839. In the following years, several other railway lines were constructed, and by the end of the 19th century, Italy had a network of railways connecting major cities and towns throughout the country. But here’s the thing about the both of them: Scorpios can change their moods and directions at the drop of a hat. These scorpions’ unpredictability matches that of the trains, which halt at the most sudden of “track changes”. Good luck trying to be the one to change route: Scorpios, calculated conductors always in control, are always one step ahead. 

While they may have a reputation for being secretive or guarded, Scorpios can also be deeply loyal and committed to those they care about, and, in the end, we really do rely on our trains to take us where we need to go–whether it’s a work commute or a seaside vacation. With Scorpios, you just need to be willing to ride out the ups and downs of the journey. 

SAGITTARIUS

Barreling through the terrifying ROTONDA (roundabout) requires a certain (high) level of self-assurance, and Sagittariuses have more than enough to go around. Over the past two decades, the urban redevelopment of the Italian road network spawned a large number of roundabouts in the late 1990s, replacing traffic lights and hazardous intersections and improving traffic flow and (in theory) reducing accidents. In reality, roundabouts are some of the most frightening sections of road to traverse. Often composed of more than four lanes, they’re a merry-go-round of honking horns, screeching brakes and colorful curses–which loose-tongued Sagittariuses have no trouble spitting out. Sagittariuses are the perfect match for the roundabout as they’re able to throw themselves into any situation with confidence (and don’t mind if they end up in the center of attention). But want to know these proud fire signs’ greatest power (and the one way to truly make it through a rotonda)? Bluffing. Though it may seem like these archers have unlimited ego, much of it is just air and an ability to find an explanation for almost anything.

Sagittariuses do have a tendency to overthink, a trait that can cause them to disregard others’ opinions. They must remember that driving around and around a mental roundabout won’t get them where they want to go. Sagittariuses, next time, listen to your navigator when they tell you you should’ve actually left the roundabout at that exit. 

CAPRICORN

Diligent and focused Capricorns know how to put in the work. At the SPIAGGIA PUBBLICA (public beach), they have no trouble marching kilometers through the sand and chaos to find the right spot–a particular feat during August when Italians have fled the cities and camp out on every square centimeter of beach available. Here in Italy, beaches are non-expropriable assets owned by the state, intended to serve the needs of the community. And we’ve got lots of beach–3.3 thousand kilometers, to be exact! 

Capricorns are not ones to take the easy way out, and so they would never pay for an overpriced bagno (of which there are over 50,000 in Italy)–the private beach establishments that offer beach umbrellas, lounge chairs and sunbeds for rent. Much of Capricorns’ success can come down to their strategy skills: these earth signs always have the long-term in mind, and finding a spot at the public beach in the sweltering sun is as calculated as it can get. Capricorns’ mental acuity allows them to plan out the placement of each and every beach towel and umbrella. But their steady natures hide the fact that, in the end, Capricorns really just want to put their feet up, read a book in the sand and take a dip in the sparkling sea. 

AQUARIUS 

Aquariuses dance to the beat of their own drum. They follow their own rules (they’re not anarchists, they do have principles!) and freedom is of the utmost importance to them. As such, they’re just like an Italian in the KITCHEN. Real Italian homestyle cooking is done by eye, by ear, by nose, and by touch. Forgoing any written recipes, Italians are masters of the all-Italian no-recipe recipe: the “method” by which just about any Italian dish can be made and the way so many of us learn to cook. Aquariuses are known for their creative and unconventional approach to life, and what better place to be open-minded and experimental than in the kitchen? Pros at thinking outside of the box, tin, and can, Aquariuses know how to have a field day with an Italian pantry, a chaotic tower of canned tomatoes, conserved fish, and jars of capers–ingredients as deep and flavorful as these air signs!

Aquariuses can also be quite stubborn and rebellious, resisting authority and convention: like a classic Italian nonna in the kitchen, they believe that their intuition is always the best!

PISCES

The perfect chaos for dreamy Pisces is the BAR. These coffee shops are a cacophony composed of coffee grinding, espresso cups clanking, people chattering and the boom, boom, boom of the barista flattening the grind. These are the types of places you could spend 20 seconds or 24 hours–perfect for Pisces who easily lose track of time. These water signs are chock-full of imagination, and there’s much on offer at the bar to feed their fantasies. Elderly in fur coats, motorcyclists who don’t even have time to take off their helmets, suits on their way to work. Artistic Pisces are highly attuned to the inspiration that can be found in coffee shops: these spaces have attracted artists, writers and creatives for years! 

Pisces are masters at finding beauty in chaos: they can easily navigate the obstacle course of the bar, finding their moment of caffeinated tranquility in a sea of mayhem. Bars are intimate spaces that allow these fish to escape from the outside world and get lost in their own thoughts.